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Sunday 9 June 2013

Just for laughs....

And on a lighter side


Best gift from a gf :)

Spot on!

It does happen from time to time.

What's your experience? From what I hear, guys and gals (in Malaysia) are doing it before they get their SPM certs.

I am guilty as charged.

To those "cam-whores".... stop taking pictures of yourself la.


Why we have so many idiots.

Conspiracy theory.

Stop being an idiot.







This is what life should be.

If you cannot 'connect' to this picture, you are way to young to read this blog!

Einstein in the making. Nothing is absolute (Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle)


Nice figure to illustrate her argument.

Not my idea of a french kiss.


Which are we?

Not bad :)




Is this true?



Massage in Shah Alam

It has been a super long week, with only 6 hours of sleep (or less) per day. So, I wanted a massage. Time - 8.30pm. Didn't want to drive all the way to PJ. So, I decided to try Asia Reflexology, at Sri Muda, Shah Alam. Went there, asked for body massage. Since I am new here, I ask for an hour only. A gal was assigned. Slim, not bad looking. No smile. And like I interrupted her. Oh. 

And then, I got a very special one hand massage. One hand pressing my leg. One hand, messaging (not to be confused with massage) on her phone. It went on. And on. Forget about it. Put it down to experience and go get some sleep. I needed the sleep by then. 

She asked me to turn over, and I did. Then she asked "First time here?" In Malay. I said yes. She said - oh - nak batin massage? I said no. I mean, look - it's just a money-face here. If I wanted a wank, I could have done it myself. And there were plenty of "wankers" (I mean, batin massage providers) around. She kept pestering me. Kept asking, why not? Finger slap my nose. Pinch my nipples. In short, real idiot. But I said, forget about it - just give a bad review online la. I didn't bother to get her name.

Finally, she sat astride me. And started rocking. Oh shit. I mean, her body looks good. The rocking motion - woke up little bro. But I didn't want anything to do with her. So, I paid and left....frustrated. No massage and left with a hard problem. Frustrated. Absolute zero... So, what's next?

PS: Moral of the story - better stick to the known good masseur (without hanky panky). If only Malaysia would clearly label "Fuckshop" or "B2B shop" or "Batin Massage", then, we know exactly what we want. All of it says "Massage", "Reflexology", "Spa" or "Health Club / Health Centre" (more like Hell Centre for some cases), when it is something else all together. And if anyone knows of a decent massage place in Shah Alam area, please let me know.

Hamsap B2B Massage in Sri Kembangan - Zero to hero.

So, I started the night from zero. Being frustrated, I decided to try out a place in Sri Kembangan. This place is known for B2B massage. Heard about it, read about it, research about it. Now it is time to try it. It was getting late - about 10pm. I was getting really tired too. I couldn't get any fun at home - H was out. H's cousin - away for the school holidays. Or on holidays somewhere.

Called the provided phone number, and said - the place is very free. He did add... but a large group is expected after 11pm. Off I went to Sri Kembangan. A few wrong turns, endless traffic lights and the rain - I finally got there. The place was well, empty. I sat down and the OKT said, he will show me a few girls. And one poor guy, in towel only, had to do the walk of shame from 'his' cubicle to the washroom. Both locations are at opposite ends of the place.

Long story short, I selected a girl in blue. Very tall, fair skin, great assets, all-natural tom yam. She spoke English. It started as a normal massage. But she could not keep her hands of me. She was comparing a certain part of my body being thicker than her wrist. That's hilarious. Oh, she had nice long hair too, which she didn't tie up. I like it. 

She was getting goose-bumps. The room was cold. I hugged her. She started to take my hands, and put in on various parts of her curves. I did not protest. She couldn't keep her hands, and mouth off me too. She was whispering all sorts to my ears "I want to do you now". The B2B didn't last too long. "Afterwards, take me slowly, ok?" Oh, the nice smooth body. Lots of licking, teasing and well, french kissing. BBBJ. 69. "So nice - I have feel". She was really really wet. Fingered. Kissed. And well, after that, she almost raped me. Almost - because I was a willing party. 

I really enjoyed it - she rode me. I was sitting up. She rode hard. Hug very tightly. And french kiss. And I could still hear her "ug ug ug ug". She didn't seem to mind when I fingered her back-hole. Hmmm. New idea for the next visit. BJ. Licked ping pong balls. Then, we did a variation of doggy style. Entered her from behind. We were on our knees. One arm hugging her assets. Another fingered her clit. She had one arm on my buttocks... pulling me hard. Another, massaging my ping pong balls. Oh. And somehow, she manage to twist her sexy body to french kiss me. Fantastic. And she had this "planking style". She was on top, legs straight and together. That made it super tight. And she will still french kiss.

All it all, it was really really good. :) By the time we finished, both of us were full of sweat. And she would still hug and kiss. Nice, no rush. The scene outside was a ASEAN meeting by now. Indians (Malaysians or Indians, I am unsure), Chinese, Viet gals, China dolls, and of course - thai girls. Oh yeah - there were two Pinoys too. No shortage of Indons or Malays (unsure - but sounds like it). Some sat and talked about work while waiting for girls / waiting to decide. By the sounds of it, it looks like a whole "rombongan" from the office. Wonder if they got corporate rates. Or was it one of those "lawatan sambil belajar". Not a bad idea for "office trip".

And some buggers started smoking. Urgh. Trust me. The girls hate it. She told me..."Oh no. Someone is smoking. I don't like." I gave a warm and friendly hug. Ahemmmm..... No one wants to lick, kiss and hug an ashtray, OK? I know.... some will retort. "What if she is also a smoker?" Well, try putting a bunch of smokers in a car. Turn on the air-cond to full. Start smoking but with the windows all up. Bad idea? You get my point. And if she really liked smoking, she should try my....never mind.

By the time I got home, it was close to 1am. Or was it after 1am. And I had to get out of bed by 6am the same day. It wasn't the next day by then. But it was really worth it. An outing that ended up completely unexpectedly. All I wanted was a damn massage. Why is that so hard to get?

Honestly, sometimes that's not the best policy

I nearly choked on my fish ball when I was reading the Metro section of The Star. The article was titled "Being honest with your friends". By.....DAPHNE IKING. 

I mean, if one cannot even be honest with the then-husband, what sort of honesty are we talking about here? OK la. To be fair, maybe she has always been honest with her friends. This is sure one lady I like to be in "friend-zone" only. 

And the name of the column? "Different Spin". No shit. It could be the ultimate spin. The only good thing is, I picked up the print edition from a table and didn't pay a cent for it. Imaging paying for this kind of articles.

http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2013/6/7/central/13207271&sec=

Sunday 2 June 2013

Job hunting

It's never easy to find a "good job". Made worse, when friends give us a lopsided view of their job. They will tell you terrible bosses, clients and co-workers. Or some will tell you good bonus, great pay, and forget about the 'bad' parts. Everything has its pros and cons. This is exactly what I mean.


Moral of the story: The grass always look greener on the other side.
Operative work: Look

More jokes





Hint: Print and stick on a douche-bag's car.





This is really: Shit just got real. Have fun and (s)pray hard.










Kaylee Brown

Here's more of the really sexy hula hoop gal.

BBBJ : Bukit Jalil

Cannot remember if I blog about it. This is a place just for bbbj with CIM, in Bukit Jalil. The girls are mixed. Young ones won't stay, but if you get their numbers, you will be able to 'follow' them. A few very good ones are "Tian Tian" - young, solid boobs, CIM, smooth skin. You could DATY till she cums. And she loves that.

Another is "Tong Tong" but she went to Sunway Mentari. Somewhat young, sucks hard, can deep throat, and she is all for pleasure. That means, if you like her to suck, she will suck more. Even after the first shot and lil' bro is still hard, she will make you shoot again. Also, CIM and allows DATY. 

Long time ago, there was a "Small Snow" there. Very smooth skin. Superb skills with tongue and lips; CIM allowed. Boobs - well, kindda saggy. 

As always - go have fun and explore!

MIA

I must apologize for being missing in action. I have been tied up (not in bed by a pretty girl) with various engineering (Electrical!) projects.

Will answer all questions, emails. And yes - if you want tips on a naughty spot, please share your experience too. Make it fun for all.