Next to a place of worship

It was during CNY, and someone commented "You are not a Muslim, of course you won't want to stay next to a mosque". 

What the eff? Firstly, how many of us has done a survey to ask if a Muslim wants to stay next to a mosque. 

Anyway, back to something close to home, I asked him "What makes you think I want to stay next to a temple?". I asked him to drive by a temple during CNY. It's very busy. Crowded. Cars parked everywhere. Full of smoke. More dust. Even more sooth and amber flying around. And I don't mean Amber Chia. 

I know of a few pretty young gals in Jenjarom. Yup - that's where the Fu Guang Shan temple is. (More like a park for money-making then a temple). For 15 days during CNY, the place would be badly jammed, every evening right till 12am or so. It would be a long queue just to turn into Jenjarom. You think those lengluis want to stay near the temple? I don't think so. They complain, openly, till no end. (That's when I offer them to stay in my spare room) We all wonder how on earth was the permit approved to bill such a huge temple sans proper roads or parking. At night, cars would park in front of their gates. The solution? They block their gates with their cars first before others do it to them. 

The only part that makes them less frustrated is, their brothers (and some of the girls too) would be smart enough and hardworking enough to open a small stall near the temple. Drinks, torch lights, handheld lamps - they all make a killing up to a few hundred ringgit per night. 

And schools. Who wants to stay right next to a school. I don't care if it is a Chinese, Malay, Kebangsaan, Tamil, Convent or co-ed school. It's all the same bunch of monkeys, as far as I can remember. I have had people ask me, "But what is wrong staying next to a school". Here's what's wrong - without prejudice to myself and no implication on my school days:

• In the days without autogates, padlocks were common. Students could take a padlock (which is unlocked and left hanging on the gate) and lock it on another house down the street.
• Flat tires, scratched cars, bent windscreen wipers - just to name a few.
• All of a sudden, some bastards would start a rock throwing contest - and someone would end up with broken tiles, windows. The objective can be hit a mango on a tree, but sometimes - students forget there is a house right behind the tree. It's seldom students throw rocks just to damage a window. No fun in that.
• No end to garbage by the road side.
• Stuffed banana in exhaust pipe of cars (especially when we - I mean, students, know that the driver is a cute lady).
• Stolen shoes, sandals, newspapers, mail (the era before email). Usually, it is 'stolen' by transferring them from one house to another house. I mean, how many pair of shoes would we want?
• Fireworks (This was an all-year affair. Students would purchase and keep fireworks - only to use it when no one expects it. The fun is in the element of surprise).
• Make a guess what these are for: Fireworks and mosquito coil. 
• Put a full can of soda under the tyre of a car. Sit and wait.
• Mud slinging contest. Sometimes, it is a pissing contest. You get the idea.
• Endless graffiti - and not the very artistic ones. It usually starts with the alphabet 'F'.
• Very loud and colourful swearing and cursing
• Randomly turning off the main water valve into the houses.
• Disturbing dogs; lastik at cats (we - I mean the students never seem to be able to hit those buggers). Don't worry - no pussies were hurt.
• Hurling textbooks, shoes, underwear, or perhaps the whole school bag into the garden of the bungalow with the meanest looking dog. Usually, that's how we dispose of lost and found items. Actually, just lost - never the found part.

Those were the days without a digital camera. Imagine what would be on our facebook pages. Then again, I never see such posting on facebook. At most, it is just plain bullying. Maybe technology has killed all the fun in growing up.