Malaysians Top Workaholic

Apparently, Malaysians are one of the top workaholics of the world. (Or "forth most dedicated work force)

http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2012/11/20/nation/12342446&sec=nation

I didn't know how to react. Shocked. Nearly fell off my chair. Angry. Dedicated my ass. Fact. This blog, has the highest hit on Mondays and Tuesdays. Lowest on Saturday and Sunday. Same with my facebook wall - least activities on weekends. Only a few sorry asses would be online for the weekend, updating Facebook statuses and blogging (yours sincerely included).

Dedicated? Dedicated to using office time, office infrastructure to surf the net for personal pleasures - that I believe. Half of the readers are planning (this is real good planning, by the way) where to get a hamsap massage after work. Oh come on, just admit it.

From my experience, here's what we are really dedicated to (in random order):

1. Nasi lemak breaks (aiyoo...I put on 3kg already, must start dieting - while stuffing themselves with nasi lemak / curry puffs)
2. Coffee breaks
3. Ciggie break (doesn't matter if you smoked or not.) ... "aiyoo - must eat organic food - else can get cancer."*
4. Gossipping
5. Facebook / Tweet
6. Run own online shop
7. Blogging (of course, the majority of these lazy buggers would just be reading a blog, but hey - that's reading too).
8. Surf porn
9. Plan for after work activities / plan for next weekend
10. Plan for next big shopping when pay check is out
11. Online shopping
12. MSN / ICQ / Google Chat / Skype / Whatsapp
13. Read online newspapers / gutteruncensored.com / fmylife.com
14. Show off new handbag / new bf / new hair-do / new car / new app / new phone. 
15. Check clock ("Aiyoo...still another 2 minutes to lunch.")
16. Take long lunches.
17. "Visit clients" (This is another fact - the bloody massage parlours, kosher and non-kosher included, are most busy at 4pm, workdays. Weekends, they are damn free).
18. Falling asleep on desk / toilet / car 
19. Quickie with sexytary / colleague; Playing footsie during meetings
20. Check-out new accounts clerk / gatal factory worker / handsome boss / young engineer
21. Tai chi work to others (usually this is the first item on their to do list)
22. Blame-storming; not to be confused with brainstorming
23. Gossip / Stir up shit
24. Gossip / Stir up shit
25. Gossip / stir up more shit

But not is all lost. This is a FACT: Employees are good actors, pretending to overwork badly. Another FACT: Employers pretend that they know their workers are dedicated, and do nothing about it. 

So, it's the year end now. To the very least, please refrain from asking "Why no bonus". If it was me, I would have fired your sorry ass a long time ago. And what pisses me off is, some young buggers would say "I want work - life balance". Read it again : Work - life balance. Work comes first, ok? Stupid buggers.

* This is a true story. I know of one smoker. Keep telling us to eat healthy, remove chlorine from water.... while happily smoking away.